Monthly Archives: March 2006

10 Chuck Norris Facts

Chuck Norris: the man, the myth, the legend. He fascinates me, and after reading this list I’ve put together from different sources you’ll be fascinated too…or else.

  1. Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer, too bad he has never cried.
  2. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is Charles. Chuck Norris did not respond, he just stared at the man until he exploded.
  3. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually “Chuck Norris—more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris—robot in disguise,” and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.

  4. Chuck Norris once shot a Nazi plane down with his finger, by yelling, “Bang!”
  5. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wise men, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
  6. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
  7. Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
  8. Before the Boogie-Man goes to bed he checks the closet for Chuck Norris.
  9. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
  10. According to the Laws of Physics, it is impossible for Chuck Norris to build more muscle. Upon realizing this, Chuck Norris swiftly roundhouse kicked every law of physics known to man, as well as those known only by Chuck Norris. He now has the ability to will his muscles to any level of strength he desires at any given time.

Down With the Fatness

I’m starting back to Weight Watchers today. Once I pushed my body over the 260lb mark I knew I needed to do something. Aside from the fact that I no longer fit into any of my suits (needed for my job) and I’m barely squeezing into my pants and shirts, it’s just plain unhealthy for a 5’10” man of 27 to weigh that much. My goal weight will be 190lbs but for starters I just want to loose 10% of my current weight: 26lbs.

Loosing weight is hard for me, see I love to eat and it’s something I’m fairly good at. I may occasionally post something regarding my weight loss, keeping y’all in the loop but no promises. I’m taking a full-body “before” picture of myself to hang on my computer monitor as inspiration. When I reach my goal I’ll take an “after” picture and then I’ll post them here, side by side, to show everyone. Until then just be praying for me, seriously, it’s hard for me not to eat. I’m an emotional eater. When I get stressed I shovel food into my mouth like a world-wide famine was coming. I need to learn to do something else when I get stressed. Maybe go on an extreme blogging binge or designing spree.

What do you guys do to deal with stress? Are any of you emotional eaters too?

Point N Click

Between family, blogging and ministry I’ve had no time lately for the important things in life like point ‘n click games. If you don’t know what I’m talking about head on over to Lazy Laces and be amazed at the sheer volume of point ‘n click games.

Not all the games there are good, some are pretty stupid. But occasionally I’ll run across a sweet game like Hapland 1, 2 or 3. This game is super hard but extremely rewarding. You have to perform the correct actions in the right order with the proper timing in order to complete your goal. Great time waster.

By the way, I checked Lazy Laces stats. Can you imagine getting over 28,000 hits per day on your site? I sure can’t.

The Forward

I read a post today by Peter Bogert and it got me to thinking about all the forwards I get from friends and family.? Look, I’ve gotta be honest with y’all, when I get a forward my usual routine is I open it up, scroll through it and look for pictures.? If there’s a link at the bottom I almost never click on it.? Clicking that link takes me away from my email, and I want to finish reading my email, not follow a rabbit trail through the land of the Web.? But sometimes I do read forwards, provided they’re prepared well.? If you really do want me to read a forward from you, here are a few tips.

  1. Edit the forwarding history from the top of the email.? There’s nothing more frustrating than scrolling through hundreds of email addresses looking for whatever it was that you wanted me to read.? Delete all those addresses, make it obvious what you want me to read.
  2. Send it just to me.? Or, similarly, BCC it to me.? BCC is a feature that every email program has, it stands for “blind carbon copy” and should be used liberally.? To use it, insert one address in the “To” section and then if you want to send it to many people, insert each additional address into the “BCC” section.? Then, when I get the email it will only contain two addresses, yours and mine.? I will have no idea who else you sent it to.
  3. The subject line of the email should be somewhat descriptive.? Subjects like “Just Do It!” and “This is For You!” make my finger move to the delete button faster than anything.? If you get a forward from someone and you want to send it on to me it’s OK to change the subject line.
  4. At the very top of the email put a short note that tells me why you sent this to me.? It adds a little bit of a personal touch to an otherwise faceless email.
  5. Before you send me an email full of “cool pictures” or “sidewalk drawings” keep in mind that I’ve been on the Net for a while now.? Chances are I saw those pictures, drawings or sand sculptures when I was in college.? I understand that when you first get an email address you find all this stuff for the first time and it’s exciting; you want to share it with everyone else.? But be honest with yourself, not everyone will be as excited as you are.? Enjoy the pictures, set them as your desktop and move on.
  6. Don’t believe everything you read.? You will never get money for signing an email petition or list or whatever.? That’s called chain mail and is garbage.? Similarly, email petitions never changed anything.? No law was ever overthrown by email petitions, no politician ever changed his mind about anything based on an email petition.? Those are chain mail too.? Don’t send me chain mail; in fact, don’t send anyone chain mail.
  7. My biggest pet peeve is the chain mail that ends with something like “If you delete this then it shows that you want Satan to win” or “If you don’t send this on then you’re showing that you are pro-terrorism.”? As soon as I see that line I revel in deleting the email.
  8. Last but not least, before you forward me something that’s just “unbelievable” make sure it’s not an urban legend by looking for it on Snopes.com.

Now I open it up to you.? What do YOU hate about email forwards?? What tips would you give to people wanting to forward you something? Be nice.

It Is Viral

Pearsonified has started a small, casual social experiment, it’s called “The Indie Virus.” Here’s how Pearsonified describes this experiment:

The experiment, henceforth referred to as “The Indie Virus,” has two goals:

  • To bring exposure to lesser known blogs (especially those outside of Technorati’s top 100)
  • To explore the metrics behind a viral linking campaign launched by the “little guys” (less popular blogs)

Dennis Bullock infected me with the virus and I find it intriguing so I’ll pass it along. I’m going to infect Adam with The Indie Virus, I’m infecting Lauren with The Indie Virus and I’m also infecting Glenn with The Indie Virus.

UPDATE: I left out Matt Bator, a natural for this sickness.? Poof, now you have The Indie Virus!

Nothing Ventured…

I enjoy designing and redesigning blogs. Well, really there are only three blogs that I’ve had a major hand in designing, this one, my old blogspot blog (which is now all but abandoned), and my brother’s blog, The Right Side. Nevertheless, I do enjoy tinkering with photoshop and code. I don’t feel that I’m good enough to actually charge money for my work so I’m offering my services at the cost of a link. I’ve put together a simple design page where I explain what skills I can offer as well as some examples of my work.

As I already said, I won’t charge money for my work but rather a link to my blog as payment. Of course, I won’t stop someone from donating money but it is by no means required.

At present I’m offering mostly banner graphic design. This is due to the fact that I’m still very unfamiliar with php (limiting what I can do with WordPress) and I’m not too familiar with Movable Type or Typepad. The only platform I’m very familiar with is Blogger and that’s because it’s what I learned on. Not to mention the fact that it’s ridiculously easy to customize. So, if you’d like me to do some work for you just contact me and we’ll get the ball rolling.

Mostly this is an experiment. I want to see how much interest I get in this. If there’s little to no interest I’ll just delete that page altogether. But who knows? Maybe people will like what I do. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Pink Flamingo

D-now desk

I posted a picture earlier of my desk on a normal work day. Well, here’s a picture of what it looks like after a big event such as Disciple NOW which we just had here at Southside Baptist. Click on the picture to go to my flickr gallery and see the notes I wrote about this image.

Disciple NOW is an annual event I have for the students at my church. It entails meeting at the church Friday evening, rocking out to a concert and then heading to a church member’s home to spend the weekend. While at the host home the students are led through a Bible study series by trained leaders whom I choose. Saturday afternoon we meet back at the church for a day of crazy games, this year’s theme was “Survivor” so you can imagine some of the games we played :twisted: .

We had a terrific time this year thanks to my great team of volunteers who gave so freely of themselves.

Anyway, about that pink flamingo…what do you think I use it for? This is like one of those “caption contests” only it’s a “use contest.” What use do you think I have for that pink flamingo?

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